man with megaphone & 3 jumping through hoops, cartoon

Having run into many bossy individuals , I believe that those who want to control every aspect of what they encounter in life are emotionally insecure. The reasons seem varied to me but the result appears the same. They hate losing control of situations.

I’ve seen many examples of this. One of the first was at a school for the blind which I was forced to attend. One supervisor loved ordering us boys to do things for her. Instead of picking up the telephone, she sent one of us, usually me, to relay messages for her. We also were commandeered to carry laundry to and from the basement of the administration building. One afternoon, I was stopped while returning to the dorm by a rain shower for about ten minutes. I sheltered in a doorway  until the downpour passed. Instead of being praised for saving the laundry from a soaking, she bawled me out for being tardy.

Another nasty woman gave me plenty of grief as a young adult. She didn’t like my long hair, bell-bottom jeans, and love of rock music. She criticized me for buying a radio which could pick up the audio from TV channels and then bought a colour TV two years later. She said her personal angel said it was all right to do that. This woman had a church in the basement of her house and ran it as if she was queen. It was her condemning my personal tastes from the pulpit which made me quit that sick little congregation.

I still run into bossy people today. They assume that everything has to be done their way or it’s wrong. A certain county bus driver became pouty a few summers ago when the seniors she drove to Edmonton wanted to be let off at the casino first rather than at the mall. In similar ways, she got angry with me and others when we suggested she change her route. She, like all control freaks, hates last-minute changes to her plans.

What people like the ones I’ve mentioned need is boundaries. If they don’t have them, they run roughshod over every one as they set up their own limits. Since I hadn’t been taught how to politely but firmly object to those who crossed my boundaries, I suffered many trying situations. Now I know it’s right to have personal boundaries of my own.

The theme of people crossing my personal boundaries is strong in all three of my memoirs. Read about the first two paperbacks at the Bruce Atchison’s Books page. My most recent memoir is for sale at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Powell’s Books.


Author: bruce Atchison - author

I'm a legally-blind freelance writer as well as the author of three memoirs and scores of articles. Contact me for details.


  1. Or, they are completely secure and are the smartest person in the room and scared out of their wits because the zombies are outside the door and one of them wasn’t totally zombified and is getting a grenade launcher from the police station (see why no city arsenal should have those things!) and they can blast their way in. QUICK everyone to the roof! We’ve called the #VFW, they are on it and we’ll have an airlift coming.


    everyone’s insecure sometimes.

    #zasaa zombie apocalypse script
    I wonder if they were men if this would have even been written?

    1. On the contrary, I’ve had some bossy men in my life as well. One supervisor at Jericho Hill School was a real tyrant. He thought he could bos us around by making us run up and down 8th Avenue before breakfast. He also fooled us by saying there was a car on fire and we all ran to see it. There was no car and no fire. He just wanted us to run.

      The ONLY reason I mentioned bossy women in this blog post was that their unwomanly conduct stood out in my mind the most. It just goes to show that women can be as nasty as men.

      1. Oh, Bruce, love, 😊, u know me … i was just playing a friendly troll before the zombies come and take everything out of context for their own reasons. Haters can be so yucky! There is no sex to disrespect! #zasaa defender of the smart peeps.

  2. Thanks, Nicole. I didn’t have room to write about the school bully who made my life hell for years. I mentioned him in other posts. The only thing that stopped him from tormenting me was when I tried to choke him to death. All the advice from adults about ignoring the bully didn’t help but attacking him did.

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